She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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