There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
i think i scared a bird with my dick
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
Randomize
