Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
sarcasm needs its own font
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
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