I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
Randomize
