Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Just to be clear, the only reason you're allowed to scream "COCKTAIL SERVANT" at bartenders is because you have nice tits
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
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