I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
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