i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Randomize
