Pappa wants mamma naked
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
where are my pants?
in the oven.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
Randomize
