I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
Randomize