Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
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