Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
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