So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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