it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Randomize