porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Randomize
