sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
A bitchslap is in order.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
