super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
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