Rock
Scissors
Fuck
No awkward lesbian experiences without me
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
Randomize
