i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
Randomize
