Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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