Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
Randomize
