The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
4 words: hood of his car
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
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