sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
