i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Randomize
