you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Randomize
