let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
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