Cab driver just said he likes mutual masturbation in the cab. Um
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
Randomize
