If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
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