AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
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