So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
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