so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
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