this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize
