four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
i drank out of a bidet.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
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