69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
Randomize
