need another drink. this is the easiest way
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
