I haven't been laid since Bush was president.
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
Randomize