so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
Randomize
