I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
Hey, this is a mass text. I have a hospital bill from November, and I don't know from what. Did anyone bring me to the hospital on a drunken night that I don't remember...?
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
Randomize
