If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
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