I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
Randomize
