I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Randomize
