it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
