It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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