can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
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