I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
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