Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
Randomize
