I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
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