I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
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