have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
Randomize
