It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
I think we might need a safe word for this...
Randomize
