Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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